Gwendolan, designated reefer girl in ships’ stores, on a smoke break. For the placement of the apostrophe we bow to the Canada Border Services Agency when at sea, and to the queen when ashore.
All posts by Svenjissom
Clever machine found in the Land of Nod
Six bootblacks perform the separate steps of a shine.
Henry Blackstone lost to the heathens
Chandler Henry Blackstone, known to his compatriots as Freddy Barbarossa, was the crowned king of magicians. He controlled spooks in he night, and was burned at the cross by a sinister crew of bandits, lashed by stout hempen cables.
That his last words were “Get that camel off my back” is a groundless assertion.
Blackstone’s father served the King in the capacity of sub-altern twice removed, and his son Grant inherited that position.
Panurge arrives at the dock in fine fettle
Panurge, accompanied by Friar John and several ladies of the night, arrived at the dock in St-Malo at zeno six hundred this morning in fine fettle of fish.
10 things to do before your random number generator crashes
All the twitter is all about all the rash of reports of random number generators crashing — in at least one case setting a woman’s hair on fire, during her passage through the rites of border security. She was positively identified by process of elimination, and by a tooth found in the ashes. We reached a robot at Homeland Incorporated who says that the incident is still under investigation, but that, knock on wood and thank the good lord, no government personnel were harmed during the filming.
Could it happen to you? The odds are not in your favor. When it happens to you, will you be ready?
Here’s the low down on upping your chances of living out this bug until the next core update:
- Jump-start the diesel generator in accordance with the least square law.
- Top up all superfluids in the rear end of the cosmic ray scintillator.
- Throw salt over your shoulder when you sneeze at the table.
Tighten Up
The Three Stooges get on the groove with Archie Bell and the Drells for a filming of three beautiful white women dancing.
For less than 50,000 Bordeaux crowns
Panurge sells his corn in the ear to settle his arrears in anticipation of a profitable outcome to the voyage.
The Gauls they lick their fingers
The Gauls are terrifying in aspect and their voices are deep and altogether harsh; when they meet together they converse with few words and in riddles, hinting darkly at things for the most part and using one word when they mean another; and they like to talk in superlatives, to the end that they may extol themselves and depreciate all other men. They are also boasters and threateners and are fond of pompous language, and yet they have sharp wits and are not without cleverness at learning.
Curve grease
They laid astore grand foison of Tramlub curve grease, from Fuchs Langley.
Entrail Roaster
A household slave, a favourite of Pericles, first citizen of Athens, when engaged in building the temple on the Acropolis, crawled on the top of the high roof and fell. He is said to have been cured by Perdicium or parthenium, which in a dream was prescribed to Pericles by Minerva; therefore it began to be called parthenium, and was consecrated to that goddess.
This is the slave whose portrait was cast in bronze, the famous Entrail Roaster or Man Cooking Tripe, by Styppax, representing the slave roasting innards and puffing out his cheeks as he kindles the fire with his breath.